_Therefore shall a man live his father and his mother; and shall cleave to his wife and they two shall be one flesh Genesis 2:24_
It was always God’s desire that marriage should be a blessing to both the man and woman, offering them tranquility and stability. In spite of the fact that our sins often gets in the way of this plans, we have all been given clear instructions by God on how to have a happy marriage.
First, we see in this verses that God invented sex. He desires that it will not only be for procreation but for recreation, for pleasure. The sexual relationship is to be enjoyed exclusively within the context of marriage, after both the man and the woman have left their families and been united. That is when the be “one flesh.”
God emphasizes the importance of leaving father and mother. After being United in marriage, the bride and Groom should earnestly seek to become independent from their parents. They are to leave their parents emotionally by working at resolving their own disagreement and problems. This will help them grow in their intimacy and unity. That doesn’t mean they will disrespect or forget their parents. The exact opposite should be true. However, they need to form a new, independent family unit. The man is now the husband of this new home and the woman the wife.
There are a few little secrets that can help newlyweds during this transition time. First, don’t live with your parents or in-laws after marriage. Work hard at being financially independence of them (preferably even before marriage). Don’t spend long periods of time at your parents home to the point of neglecting your spouse. Finally, don’t turn your parents into babysitters for your children.
On the other hand, don’t neglect them or forget important dates like birthdays or anniversaries. It’s important to show love and respect their wishes, always working on building strong relationships.
Another thing God wants us to remember here is the importance of intimacy. Adam and Eve were naked but not ashamed Genesis 2:25. Marriage is the most intimate relationship on Earth. This intimacy is physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual. In marriage, the husband and wife should be naked before each other and get to know each other through touching. They should also be emotionally “naked” as they share feelings, joys, sorrows, difficulties and dreams. They cry together, laugh together. Intellectual nudity is characterized by an open dialogue, a sharing of interest and opinions without fear or being judged or rejected. Finally, spiritual unity is established when both have the same Faith so they can pray together and grow together. An investment in each of this area is fundamental for a happy, lasting marriage.
God is all wise and His counsel to that first couple is still effective for couples today. Invest in your marriage and pray, asking God for guidance. He really wants what’s best for your lives.