LOVE OR LUST?

AMNON AND THE DANGER OF UNCONTROLLED LUST

Amnon was king David’s firstborn son, born and raised during the year between David’s rise to fame and his rise to power. He grew into a prince with too much time on his hands and too little control over his thoughts. Amnon set in motion one of the most shameful and destructive series of actions in the Royal Family. He allowed himself to become obsessed with sexual desire for his half-sister Tamar. When his attempt to seduce Tamar failed, he raped her. Then, his “desire” for her became loathing and he humiliated her. He even made it look like the incest was his sister’s fault. Tamar’s full brother Absalom later avenged her shame by killing Amnon.

David was an ineffective father. He failed to train or discipline his children. Although he found out and was furious about Amnon’s action, he did nothing. Amnon, like the rest of his siblings, was a child out of control. He was frustrated when he couldn’t have his way, yet he was disgusted when he did get his way. Without direction, his actions led to self – destruction. The Bible records not even a hint of remorse for what he had done to Tamar.

Family relationships can be sources of strength or systems of dysfunction. We can think about childhood by counting scars and nightmares or by remembering security and dreams. We may be creating in our own children one or the other of these histories. In what specific ways have you been settling the painful issues of the past in your own life? In what ways are you contributing to a better past for your children?

Weaknesses and mistakes:

• Allowed lustful desires to dominate his life.
• Listened to his cousin Jonadab’s bad advice.
• Raped and then rejected his half-sister, Tamar.

Lessons from his life:

• Children who have everything often lack purpose and direction in their lives.
• Thoughts and impulses turn self-destructive if not controlled or channeled.
• Parents contribute good or evil by action or inaction in their children’s lives.
• The distance between lust and hatred is very short.

Key Verse: “Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone” (2 Samuel 13:15)